2 CBSTV Movie: "Twelve Angry Whites"
4 NBC America's Got Autism
5 ABC A New Vehicle For That Actor Who Was In That Much Better HBO Show
7 Fox A new reality show from the makers of American Idol: "Who Will Be The Next Great American Band to Sign Over All Their Publishing Rights to Fox?"
9 CW America's Next Top Model: This week, the girls must show their poise while interrogating members of Cambodia's genocidal Khmer Rouge regime and wearing wigs made of salad.
12 Univision Si, Hombre ... Si
13 PBS Ken Burns Pretty Much Owns This Space Now
18 TNT We run "Law & Order" reruns so often, that we must start every episode with a disclaimer that Jerry Orbach is no longer alive.
19 HBO Short Documentary: The Making of Something That's Not As Good As The Sopranos
20 MTV Hey, Lard Ass!
21 VH-1 An Interview With a Classic '60s Rock Star Brought To You By Antipsychotic Drug Thorazine
22 Cinemax Prohibited Issuings
23 Showtime The Whiny, Mumbling Pot Dealer
24 E! Entertainment Television Our Official Countdown of the 20 Most Prevalent Celebrity Diseases and Pathogens
25 Animal Planet Animal Cops Entrap Gay Panda Ling-Ling in a Minneapolis Airport Bathroom
27 HBO2 The Fantastic Four
28 We How To Trash Your Wedding Planner's Name On the Internet
29 Do-It-Yourself They Don't Build Brick Shithouses Like They Used To
30 Discovery Health They Don't Build Birth Canals Like They Used To
31 Fox News The John Wayne Gacy Factor
32 Hallmark Sarah, Tall And Dilated
33 Discovery Mythbusters use sophisticated fluid mechanics techniques to see if they can knock obstreperous dwarf comedian Chuy into a dunk tank.
34 The Prayer Network God Gave Me Life
35 Lifetime Hormone Replacement Therapy Gave Me Life
37 Sundance Environmental Month Continues With the Documentary, "We Love Our Town Made of Shit"
38 CNN Larry King and Jenny McCarthy seem to have been talking at cross purposes for 10 minutes and are no longer even having the same discussion. As best I can tell, they're either talking about Autism Spectrum Disorders or whoopee cushions.
39 Court TV Forensic Files: The mouse and duct tape blew this case wide open.
40 Spike TV A Wide and Arbitrary Bunch of Things You Can Slide Around In
42 Food Network Touch My Leek
(Originally posted Oct. 3, 2007)