(Originally posted Tuesday, October 09, 2007) Everybody's talking about the new book from Motley Crue bassist and songwriter Nikki Sixx, "The Heroin Diaries: A Year In the Life of a Shattered Rock Star." This compellling book offers up many shocking revelations and profound insights. Here are some samples of his crazy life:
" ... 2:14 p.m. Los Angeles. I wake up with my head in a jack-o-lantern and both my fists lodged into quick-drying cement. My pants are down. Is this heaven or hell? ... "
" ... 8:27 a.m. Greenwich Mean Time. Egypt. I feel nothing but see Tommy performing sternum massage on me while a half dozen models are screaming. In the corner are a paper lantern and a Shmoo singing "Pack Up Your Troubles." How did I go so far off the rails? ... "
"...6 a.m. strung out in Alaska. The sun hasn't set in a month. In my right hand is a dead seal and in my left is a can of Clorox. How did things go so wrong?..."
" ...8:30 p.m. How did the ice get up there?..."
" ... 10 p.m. Fisherman's Wharf. I pulled my lobster cage out of the bay, but there's nothing in it but bottom-feeders. How true that is..."
"... 7:56 p.m. Ottawa. Axl Rose has me in a head lock between the buttocks and lets out an explosive fart. We're on the inside track to nowhere man..."
" ... 6:32 a.m. Frankfort. This is a stinky shit life. I don't know how to live, only how to die. Hmmmm... White Castle's open ... "
" ... 7:00 p.m. Los Angeles. I ask the doctor for methadone. He replies: "I can't give you methadone, I'm a veterinarian." I am one with insanity ...."
" ... 5:15 p.m. Okinawa. Even in the Far East, my friends have left me. Godzilla was a pretty good movie. ..."
" ... 6:47 p.m. Santiago, Chile. That housekeeper is a narc. Jean-Claude and I lie out in the sun and listen to The Rolling Stones. Wait a minute ... who is Jean-Claude?....."
" ... 7:16 p.m. Oshkosh, Wisconsin. I was riding my motorcycle with no clothes on and ... oh shit, that's going to burn tomorrow..."
" ... 8:20 p.m. Tulsa. All my friends are dead. What is that smell? ..."
" ... 8:15 p.m. Idaho. I only know a town by its women. I dreamt I was makin' it with Marilyn Monroe. But it was just some Goth chick, and I think she gave me a case of galloping knob rot. The sunrise knows I am no good ..." " ... 9:21 a.m. I'm a spoiled millionaire little boy rock star shit who's hit the tubes. Thank God my girlfriend's a Playmate, otherwise I'd have no perspective. ..."
"... 9:56 p.m. ah man, feces again...."
" ... 8:18 a.m. Piedmont. Bitch took my gun..."
" ... 10:59 a.m. My accountant wants me to invest in commodities ..."
" ... 8:29 p.m. Quebec. I was licking a Fentanyl lollipop I stole from a cancer patient and saw the most beautiful fairy singing the most beautiful song ever in my head saying, "here I give this to you to share with the world, Nikki" ... then my respiratory system shut down and it was gone forever. Wait a minute, is it Tuesday?....."
" ... 10:12 a.m. Wallachia-Transylvania. I picked up a stripper on my motorcycle and brought her back to my pad. ... I don't know how we got to this part where I'm in a grave and she's throwing dirt on my face. I hope kids read this and learn something from me someday..."